The Bravest woman i ever know

I cant think straight. I cant string two words together. The Bravest woman I ever knew is struck down. Cancer. I thought this was the 21st century damn it..we are supposed to be the most intelligent species on earth. We spend immeasurable amount of time and money on making things better. What is the point of it all if we cant do anything to this.

I have started to believe in God. For two reasons. One I cant believe that anyone human can ever think up something so tragic and cruel to another person's life. It certainly cant be a human thought who could inflict such a pain on a person and their loved ones. To take away someone like that from the clasps, from the desperate grasps of love, their hands clawing to pull them back to normalcy…that cant be the work of a human. To methodically keep removing every single hope, every single sliver of light, every single reason to wake up..definitely not human. To empty the mind of hope, happiness and a future and fill it with woe, despair and hatred…Cant be human at all. Definitely there must be another hand at play..another hand more powerful…more vengeful…more sadistic..more power-drunk. Must be GOD. The other reason I now believe in god is for hope..that there might be some last minute magic..some last minute miracle…something that might save…something that might make this all nothing more than the worst nightmare…something that could make this all go away…oh please I believe in God. Please let me believe. Give me a reason to believe ..begging you..Please