I will never stop....writing

I have been blamed that I am not writing often now. In fact is not ‘often’ but rather ‘at all’ now. I think it’s time I try to find the root cause myself because just like all I am also at a loss.

I write in multiple modes and write multiple things. I maintain (rather sporadically) two blogs. I also like to do it old school, with a fountain pen and paper. In fact writing in the traditional form has always relaxed me and in a torrent I would be able to scribble away about 20-30 pages before which I would need to take a break to think. It’s so relieving to clean out your  mind like that. So I indulge in this sort of activity once in a while. But the problem is, most of the time, I attempt a fiction story and I am able to get excited enough to think it would be the next big thing to rock the Indian literary scene. Then start my writing explosion but like any other explosion it runs out of steam. The end result about seven to eight books all half written upto the point of where the typical intermission will come if the book is made as a movie (that’s the way I roll, never think small, think big or in this case gregariously enormous)

My digital version is more controlled. Less than 200 posts in about 6 years. Even in that I managed to cheat a bit by writing short series or some really long series so eventually it would be like just one post instead of the multiple posts that add to my count. I mostly use my blog to belt out poems. The problem is most (read as all) poems are about my inherent survival and revival and me standing up to the pressures of the world and enemies ( yeah, I know …boring right). For me writing these aren't for others but rather just me motivating myself to get a move on in life. But even that is getting a bit boring for me. I cant write romantic poems or lovey dovey songs. I am just not wired like that. Nor can I go about writing about the troubles of any ethnic group. I am a selfish bugger at heart and I can write about me, my experiences, my thoughts. ME ME ME. And invariably that is where the blog fails and I fail as a writer.

 I am right now in the middle of the biggest gamble of my life and if things work out then I would have achieved success or my version of it. My version of success is just like my dreams. Gregariously enormous. Although that isn't excuse enough, it looks like a valid reason to me to suspend writing for a bit. All till I am done with this hand that I am playing. Then I will write, Will write about all the crazy machinations, the ridiculous planning sessions, the ludicrous decisions, the immature fights, the devious enemy actions. Hmmm, I got a bestseller in my hand already, I know it.

But that cant be excuse. Please hold on. I am starting a new series possibly next week. I got the plot down all in my…notebook. Hopefully the digital version will see it completed.