i was just doing channel surfing when i came across a classic movie. "SETHU"...an awesome movie, so light-hearted in the first half and ends in a tragic note. i was so much engrossed in the movie and just forgot the time. at the end of the movie was when i noticed that i was crying...and not just moistness in the eyes. Unabashed ...unfettered...unashamed.
Not that the movie is something new to me, or that it was so emotional..i think my mind just felt like crying. it got me thinking as to when was the last time that i really cried out...cried out to my heart's content.
Was it at a similar movie like this ? was it a fight ? was it an argument ? was it out of pain? was it out of desperation? was it out of depression? was it for a breakup? was it for a failure? was it for a loss?
I really cant recall. I really dont want to recall also. Why to think back on such memories when I am sure that it will repeat again. There will again come a chance or time for me to cry again. When i shall cry again...when i shall feel free to cry.
Crying is the most basic of emotions and i am glad that i can cry. It still reminds me that i am still human...that i am still capable of having feelings...of having emotions...of still accepting that i am vulnerable...that i still can be hurt or effected..
A man isnt supposed to cry...supposed to make him look like a sissy..like a loser..i have this small concept..a man who lies to someone means that he is scared of that person. But when a man lies to himself as to what he is feeling, it means he is scared of his very existence...and that is even more pathetic than being called a sissy.
atleast i cry and prove that i aint scared of my life...i am not ashamed to cry..i stand tall and cry and say that i am still a man...a honest man !!!
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